Defective

• I bought a garlic press so I could crush the ever-lovin' daylights out of limes for limeade with that "fresh from the tree" taste. Unfortunately, I snapped the metal of the garlic press. Stupid flimsy inferior metals. There ought to be a law.
• The other day a woman came into the store with her 18-month-old child. After purchasing some toys and unsuccessfully attempting to leave the store several times, she turned to me. Would you tell us to leave?
  
  I stared at her, stunned. However, she didn't wait for a response, but immediately whirled towards her child. Okay, this man told us we need to leave! C'mon, sweetie! This man said we have to go, so say goodbye!
  
  My anger immediately and tirelessly burned against this woman. Stupid incompetent mother. There ought to be a law.